come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Randomize
