I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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