I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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