Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize