i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
