found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
