You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
