It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
