pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I currently don't understand fingers.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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