And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
