I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
