i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
even my farts smell like vagina
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
