Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Sex in the backyard? Check.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
