She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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