The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
