Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
