Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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