at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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