No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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