I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Randomize
