It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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