Kiss
Puke
too bad you live with your parents still
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize