Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
