The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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