If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize