Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
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