And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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