It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Randomize
