dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
