she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
