just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize