Christians are straight up FREAKS
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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