I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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