So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Randomize
