I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize