We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize