Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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