gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
