My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
