Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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