Jerry, you need to find god
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
