dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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