ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Randomize
