My brain says no but my pants say off.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
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