So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
