Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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