so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Randomize
