Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize