He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
