We're like a lot better than the average bears
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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